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Grieving the death from suicide of someone close to you, you may find your grief is very different than from other losses. It may also differ from that of other people who knew the person who died. You may experience changes in your relationships; powerful, unpredictable, and sometimes confusing emotions; physical reactions; and changes in thinking and memory.
The need to seek answers, understand what has happened, or find some meaning in the death is often one of the most difficult aspects of grieving a suicide. In time, you may find some answers; or you may come to accept there will never be answers to all your questions. Some of your beliefs about the person who died, yourself, or life in general may be challenged. Finding ways to cope with your grief and get the support you need is essential to your health and well-being. You may come to recognize that more is needed beyond friends, family and your service family and family therapy or individual counselling may be most helpful.
More resources
To learn more about grief and suicide, here are some places to start:
- Canadian Virtual Hospice - MyGrief.ca - When someone has died by suicide
- Canadian Grief Alliance - AboutGrief.ca - Grieving a death by suicide
- Atlas Institute for Veterans and Families – Knowledge Hub: Suicide prevention for Veterans and family members
- Mental Health Commission of Canada (MHCC) - Toolkit for people who have been impacted by a suicide loss
- British Columbia Ministry of Health - A Practical Guide for Survivors of Suicide
- Alliance of Hope: Suicide Loss Survivors - A website that offers information about grief, legacy and remembrance forums
- Crisis Centre of BC - A Practical Guide for Survivors of Suicide
For more support
To access professional help for CAF Veterans, former or current RCMP members, family members, or caregivers, start by calling the VAC Assistance Service 24-hour toll-free line at 1-800-268-7708. This service offers face-to-face psychological support, bereavement support, and referral services. You can also utilize the online chat service to schedule an appointment with a mental health professional.
Veterans, families, and active members of the Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) can access the Canadian Armed Forces Member Assistance Program (CFMAP) 24-hour toll-free line at 1-800-268-7708 or by TDD at 1-800-567-5803.
If you have thoughts of harming yourself or others, call your local Crisis Line, or call or text 9-8-8. If you have a plan, this is a medical emergency. Ask someone to take you or go to your nearest Emergency Department or call 911. It is essential that you reach out for help.